A Replacement
by Stardust Terrastar
Summary: Maybe this was my fate, my calling, but if only I knew that I'd feel and go through all of these, then I would've stayed inside the castle where I'd be the hidden treasure, an important key and not some replacement. And inside my castle, I'd have a dragon—my dragon—who'll guard my every move and protect me from harm. "When Lisanna is gone, I'll be Natsu's replacement again."


I disclaim Fairy Tail and for better viewing, please read this with a shorter page size (3/4) because I think it _looks_ better that way. Hehehehe.

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**A Replacement**

**By Stardust Terrastar**

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Forcing a smile can be tiring, lying every single time is exhausting and pretending to be fine can burn someone out. But I have to do all of these to be with them, I have to force myself to smile, to lie and to pretend, to act as if nothing is wrong and to move as they expected me to do so.

But as I said, it can be tiring, it can be exhausting and it can drive someone to his/her edge. And I'm full of it. Full of all the lies I did, full of deceiving my friends, telling them I was okay and absorbing all the negative thoughts in my mind.

I don't want this anymore, heck, I didn't even signed up for this. I mean, who would agree on becoming the martyr for your best friend who loves your best friend who you also love? No one in the right mind would do so, no one but me. That, or I'm becoming insane as well.

"Lucy! Lucy!" Happy, a flying blue cat known as an Exceed flew above my head, calling out my name cheerfully as he nibbled on a fish. I smiled softly at him and glared at him when he told things along the lines of jealousy, she liiiikes him, and things as such.

Because that is all she could do to deny the truth: glare and pretend that it was a joke. Even though clearly, its not.

It's no joke watching the person you love show those passionate glances to another girl. It isn't funny to watch as _he_ consider you as his best friend, a nakama, an ally, and other than that, nothing more and nothing less.

And it is very painful to see them, knowing that _he_ made you feel this way, it was his choice, not yours, to make you fall for him. And it is so unfair! It is so unfair that he sent you those, those signals that made your mind go haywire.

_"Lucy!" he smiled as the rainbow colored cherry blossom trees passed by room, showing the beauty that you thought you won't see…and showing you that he cared_.

And it didn't end at just that. He played with me, he confused me and made me believe that _us_ has a chance, that he got over her and that they are _just_ friends. That is why you ignored those short glances between them, that is why you let your guard down.

And then one day, he proposed to you…to me…

_"I have something to say to you…Lucy…"_

_"What is it Natsu, better make it quick coz' I still have a _lot_ of things to do! Rents to pay," you said but you were really nervous at how nervous he looked. Because Natsu Dragneel was _never_ nervous. _

_'I…I like you Lucy…I've always had…' it made you choke on that glass of juice you were drinking as you stared at him, the densest guy on earth, disbelievingly. _

_'W-what are you talking about, Natsu?' you stuttered, blood rising up to your cheeks._

_'And…and…when I thought you were gone, my…my heart was crushed,' wait? What is this guy saying…It sounded weird but you remembered the time when you were sucked in Edolas…maybe that's what he was referring to. _

_You were about to ask if he was serious and tell your feelings for him when all of a sudden, you heard a lot of crashing, precious kitchenware breaking on the floor, which surprised everyone in the Guild including the both of you, destroying your _moment_._

_She looked so much in pain, as she covered her mouth and prevented herself from crying out loud. And when she noticed that all of the eyes were on her, she ran away. Confused, you turned your gaze back on him and was about to tell him that you love him when he followed her. _

_And his eyes, they had something in them that you've never seen before. _

_And that is when it hit you…he was practicing. The fool was practicing his freakin' lines and decided to break your heart. And to avoid any unwanted attention, you decided to head out and go home. _

_And as expected, when you came in the next day, they became Fairy Tail's hottest couple. He said sorry for pranking you like that but you shrugged it off, joking that you knew all along that he was joking._

_And that was the beginning of your misery. _

After that, it went downhill for you. Everything felt painful, when you sleep on your empty room without him and his heat by your side, you felt cold and empty. And every dream you had were asphyxiating, they were nightmares that suffocate you causing you to wake up and remember that he wasn't there by your side any longer, and most probably, he was by her side.

The so-called girl who he loved ever since he laid eyes on her…before you were even in Fairy Tail…

But when you thought you were used to the pain, you had a game in your team that do not involve _her_, and had your confessions there.

You were surprised that Gray had admired Erza somewhere on their past, like a tiny little crush of some sort, and were even more surprised when Erza liked Natsu as she remembered Jellal from the boy. But the most surprising and equally painful thing you heard is that Natsu liked you once, and the reason behind it was that you look so much like Lisanna, just like Mirajane told you many times in the past.

And you came to the realization. Those hints, everything he did for you, when he decided to protect you and fight for you to the death even if you're just a newbie, was all because he _sees_ her in you, because he sees her in _me_….and because _I _became her temporary replacement.

Its actually funny, really, when I thought that I would've loved being Lisanna even just for a day so that I could feel those passion-filled touches and those fiery gazes the two shared when all these time, I never knew that for him, I _was_ her.

Of course you were upset, but you never showed them, Lucy. Because you want to let them know that you are tough, that you're no damsel in distress and princess locked up in a castle any longer.

You are Lucy Heartfilia, a Celestial Mage with Ten Golden Keys in your arsenal including the Leader of the Twelve Zodiac, the Leo the Lion.

But then, you remembered that you're still a person, a girl who have the capability to feel pain and loss, and whenever you remember that, you fall into tears, _my_ whole body shaking as if my soul is shattering.

But even so, even with everything that happened, you put up a mask to hide your tears.

Even through it all…I continued forcing a smile, I continued to lie everytime they asked me if I was okay, and I continued to pretend that I am still the Lucy they all knew, the _extra_ Lisanna that they need in case she disappears once more.

Maybe this was my fate, my calling, but if only I knew that I'd feel and go through all of these, then I would've stayed inside the castle where I'd be the hidden treasure, an important key and not some replacement.

And inside my castle, I'd have a dragon…_my_ dragon…who'll guard my every move and protect me from harm.

Sometimes I wish that I was a princess once more.

Because if I was…then I wouldn't be doing this…

"Lisanna, where are you?"

"Lucy I'm here! Help me! Please! Before she comes back."

"Why should I Lisanna?" And I couldn't help but smile as her eyes widened in fear.

_When Lisanna is gone, I'll be Natsu's replacement again. I'll be with Natsu once more._


End file.
